


Miranda's Obsession

by Perversity



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M, Romance, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-13
Updated: 2013-05-12
Packaged: 2017-12-11 17:36:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/801327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Perversity/pseuds/Perversity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Miranda has developed an obsession for the man she spent two years bringing back to life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this story not too long after Mass Effect 2 was released. There just weren't a lot of fics involving Miranda, and the ones that did exist were with a Female Shepard. Even today there's not a lot of MaleShep and Miranda fics, which is really odd. This was another story I never finished, HOWEVER it leads right up to them having sex, so anyone who is just reading for the naughty parts it's all there.
> 
> I was never completely happy with how I wrote this story. If I ever do write something involving Miranda again, and I probably will, then it will be a completely different story. I wanted to depict Miranda as having fallen in love, quite against her will, with Shepard.

In all my years of life, I’ve never once felt the need to tie myself to anyone. Jacob and I had been intimate for over a year, but neither one of us believed for a single second it was anything more than physical. I was fine with that, we both were, but when the Lazarus Project started to keep me busy, resulting in the two of us not getting any time alone for weeks at a time, we decided to put an end to things.

Nonetheless, I cared a great deal for Jacob and for the first time in my life, I felt the ugly feeling of regret in my chest. He deserved better than what I could offer him and we both knew it.

After we ended things I became utterly obsessed with the project. Bringing someone to life is one thing, but the project would be considered a complete failure if the subject is psychologically different than who he was before. The story of Shepard’s life leading up to the destruction of the Normandy was a long read, and I must admit with great reluctance that I became obsessed trying to learn every single detail about him.

Within just a few months, I knew Shepard more than anyone else could claim. He lost his parents at a very young age and learned how to survive on his own, before eventually joining a gang. There are, of course, no records of his actions within the gang, but apparently it eventually led to him being recruited into the Alliance military the day he turned eighteen.

He was at the top of his class, being one of the few recruits who had used a gun long before joining the military. His instructors described him as a uniquely talented marksman with a penchant for getting himself into trouble and some how, some way, always getting himself out of it. He was a natural leader, inspiring others to follow him even into the most dangerous of situations.

He and his squad won several mock battles before graduating, with his team attributing many of their successes to his ability to command them from hundreds of yards away even as he was picking off targets with his sniper rifle. In close range combat, he prefers to use a handgun which he can use with deadly accuracy, only augmented by his talent with hand to hand combat.

After he graduated from the academy the reports stop immediately. A rather large payment to the Shadow Broker revealed that Shepard was involved in many covert assignments involving assassination and espionage across the galaxy before taking leave on Elysium. On the very day he arrived, a massive force of pirates attempted to raid the colony. Shepard rallied a small army and held off the raider long enough for reinforcements to arrive. Shepard was awarded the highly coveted Star of Terra for his bravery that day, and he became much more widely known.

After that he was assigned to the Normandy as Commander Shepard working under Captain Anderson shortly before the attack on Eden Prime.

I know everything possible about Shepard. I know him so well that when I brought him back to life, I felt such a strong feeling of relief, not because the difficult project was coming to an end but that of all the people in the galaxy, I was the one who brought him back. In a way I felt closer to him than anyone else in my entire life. I was obsessed with him, and I hated it.

Being assigned to watch over him was both a blessing and a curse. I got to be around the man I had spent over two years getting to know every detail about. There were things about the real man that weren't ever included in the reports. Like the fact that I’ve never met anyone who can be smiling and disarming one minute, then cold and extremely deadly the next.

He has quite the silver tongue, and though he can go from talking to killing in the blink of an eye, he always tries to solve a dispute with words instead of bullets. I like that about him, but it also frustrates me to no end. There have been many situations when answering with a bullet would have solved a problem a lot quicker, but he insists on doing things his way and isn’t afraid to remind me that he’s the one in command if I try to assert my own will.

Few can look at me straight in the eyes and tell me no, but he does it without the slightest hesitation, and every single time I do as he says. I have a soft spot for the man I resurrected, and it irritates me.

It probably wouldn’t be such a problem if he didn’t stop by my office to talk all the time. I have no problem with chatting, but it’s so odd how easily he can get me to talk about myself. In only a few days he had me talking about my enhancements and my father, things I rarely even spoke to Jacob about.

He…he told me that who I am what makes me great, and it has nothing to do with my modifications. I’ve tried to convince myself of that for years, but hearing Shepard say it, although I haven’t exactly had the best attitude toward him, made me believe it for just the fraction of a second, and that made me happy.

Every time we’ve spoken, he hasn’t given me one inappropriate look. I can pick up people staring at my body with startling accuracy, and he has always been respectful enough to look me in the eyes when he speaks to me. I was genetically modified to be beautiful for the purposes of playing on a human’s natural attraction to get what I want. Unfortunately, it causes people to focus on my beauty rather than my intelligence, and while it does serve a purpose in some situations, it’s counter-productive in others.

This unique man was not doing a thing to dissuade my obsession. Everything I’ve learned a man would do in my presence didn’t apply to him. It wasn’t until a solid month later when I started to feel like I wanted him to look at my body. Is it too much to ask to be respected in both body and mind? The few men I’ve been attracted to were always very direct in their intentions, but Shepard was different. He kept me guessing. A warmth was beginning to build inside of me, a feeling I’ve never experienced before, and it was worrying me.

That warmth intensified when he agreed to help me relocate my sister without hesitation. I was reluctant to ask him, preferring to just go at it alone, but I’m not foolish enough to turn away help when it’s offered. When Niket betrayed me, I was far more hurt than I cared to admit. I cared about Niket a lot, and he was my best friend. His death still haunts me even to this day.

Shepard stopped by my office after I met my sister, and we talked again, but this time felt different. I felt different. My sister was okay. She finally knew I existed. I felt happy, and Shepard was there to make me feel warm again. It was just the perfect moment.

Niket’s death made me feel like anyone I care about could die at any moment. It’s not a new realization by any means, but it’s a fact that we’ve all assimilated into our daily lives. Shepard had already died once, and the thought of him dying again made me scared in ways I’d never admit. I don’t want him to die. I want that feeling he gives me every time he looks at me to last for the rest of my life. It made me feel insecure. Even with my modifications, would I be good enough to save him if it came down to it? Without my modifications would I be here with him? When I mentioned my modifications again, he looked annoyed.

“We don’t need to go back to that again, Miranda.” He said to me and stood up, walking closer to me as I peered out the view port. I felt him close but didn’t turn around.

“It’s not something I can ignore, Shepard. It’s who I am.” I finally turned to look at him, noticing how close he was, only a foot away, and I felt the warmth heat in my chest. I barely succeeded in hiding my reaction to his proximity, enjoying it far too much.

“So I’m not supposed to admire your body or your mind? You give your father too much credit. He gave you gifts, but you’re the one who uses them. You are who you are because of the decisions you’ve made, the things you’ve experienced, and the mind you possess. Your modifications are just a very small part of a much greater whole.”

I stared at him, speechless, for several moments before smiling. The smile was completely different to what was going through my mind. Damn this man. Damn him!

“Perhaps I wouldn’t mind if you admired my body more often.” I don’t know what possessed me to be so direct about it, but I just knew he wouldn’t mind. I know everything about him after all.

Indeed, he smiled back at me and closed the last foot of distance between us, his body pressing against mine, causing the warmth in my chest to rapidly spread to the rest of my body. He’s a little taller than I am. Damn him!

“Oh really? I guess I can stop hiding it then?” His chuckle made me look up at him in surprise before his lips descended and pressed to mine. For only a brief moment the kiss is possessive and deep, making me sigh into his caressing lips and press closer to him for more of that delicious contact that is stoking the warmth inside of me into a blazing fire, threatening to consume me in all the right ways, but then it becomes light and teasing, making me press my press my lips harder against his for more.

I hadn’t anything approaching intimate contact in over a year. Compound that atop the intense obsession I’ve had with knowing everything about him, and the feelings he’s been causing within me, and not even I am ashamed by how much I enjoyed it, how much I craved it. His kiss drove me crazy, sometimes only lightly brushing against my lips, while other times kissing me so strongly my lips felt swollen from the contact.

My previous lovers were all the same, wanting everything right then and there, but Shepard took his time, allowing the warmth in me to simmer down before setting it ablaze again with his mouth and body. Damn him! I practically mold my body to his, wanting him to want me as much as I wanted him.

He groaned into the kiss, causing me to become immeasurably pleased with the sound. I made him lose his ironclad control. Me and no one else. His arms wrapped around me and kept me close, making sure that he could feel every shudder I made, which only caused me to practically melt in his arms.

But then he did something unexpected, and to this day I still hate him a little for it. He pulled his lips away from mine and looked into my eyes, his intense gaze making me shift against him. I can’t remember ever wanting someone that much before meeting him. Damn you, Shepard!

“Miranda, if I don’t stop now I’m going to carry you to your bed and keep you there for a week. I’m certain you’re not ready for that yet.” His right hand gently grabs my chin and gives me one last, gentle kiss that makes my mind a little fuzzy.

He was right. Even though I wanted him badly enough to nearly take him up on his offer, I wasn’t quite there yet. I needed to think about my feelings for him, these emotions that I never felt for anyone else before.

I smiled at him and gave him one last hug before I pulled away and put some distance between us before I had the chance to change my mind. I felt a startling loss without his body against mine, but I hid my disappointment well.

“Thank you, Shepard. You’re right, I need time to think.” He smiled and then tried to even out his ruffled shirt before turning to leave. “We’ll be at Illium in a few hours. If you need anything I’ll be spending the majority of that taking a cold shower.”

That conjured up one hell of an image in my mind, and he chuckled at my reaction just as the door swished closed behind him. I shuddered, feeling like I could really use the same. The Normandy was going to need to refill its water supply at Illium.


	2. Part 2

Not one moment in my life had I ever been jealous. Why should I be? I may have more or less been a prisoner when I was growing up but my father was extremely rich and gave me anything I wanted. There has never been a man beyond my ability to claim and no intellectual pursuit beyond my ability to accomplish.

However, when I saw Shepard's smile as Liara T’Soni embraced him in a tight hug; felt it. I felt it so keenly I couldn’t stand it. I am, however, a woman capable of controlling myself, and I didn’t let on that their familiarity made me uncomfortable. Shepard waved us both from the room so the two could talk about business and as the doors closed shut behind us Jack decided to chime in.

“Well well, did you see that, cheerleader? Those two seem awfully close.” She smirked at me, and I had to use every calming technique I know not to remove it from her face. As crazy and undisciplined as Jack is, she’s incredibly perceptive, and if I let on a single clue that it bugs me, she’d pick right up on it.

I crossed my arms and leaned against the wall beside the door. “Well he did save her life, and they traveled together for well over a year. It’s not surprising that they’d be happy to see each other.”

Jack only laughed and shook her head. “Come on, she’s an Asari that wasn’t officially under his command and the two of them are pretty chummy. From what I hear, they were in some bad situations during their hunt for Saren. I know this is all new to you, but after a big fight having a warm body to come back to is a great way to get rid of all that stress.”

I know what that’s like, bitch! I had to be satisfied with only saying that in my head, but the temptation to voice the thought was almost overwhelming. Still, she had a valid point. After Jacob and I had shared some drinks together, we had quite a night and of all the three guys I’ve slept with, Jacob was the one who liked taking his time. Having a convenient outlet like that was one of the reasons that first year of the Lazarus Project was so tolerable.

The door thankfully slid open, allowing me to avoid continuing the conversation, and Shepard stepped out with a datapad in his hand. “Hey, I got the information we need.” He pressed a few buttons and a picture appeared. “This is Thane Krios, the assassin we’re looking for. There’s an Asari here on Illium who’s willing to give us information on his location. We’ll find him first before we go after the Justicar.”

We decided to stop at a few places to buy some supplies before going to meet the contact, and within half an hour my annoyance had grown markedly. It started with a beautiful woman Shepard knew from his past, some white collar crime investigator named Gianna. Apparently, he had solved a problem for her a while back and needed his help again. She seemed quite pleased to see Shepard, more so than she should have been.

After turning on the charm and convincing an Asari to admit to a theft, Gianna thanked him with a kiss on the cheek, which Shepard didn’t seem to mind one bit. Not ten minutes after that he ran into an old friend, Asari again, who needed help. I was far more familiar with the Feros mission, having a full report and witness testimonies, and apparently she’s an ex-commando that used to work for Saren before Shepard and his team destroyed the Thorian and allowed her to live.

She was much more direct about her intentions and made an obvious suggestion about meeting up again when they’re both less preoccupied. Jack’s smirk steadily became a grin with each new woman who seemed to want a chance with the Commander.

“Goddamn, Shepard, what the hell is up with you and Asari, it seems like all of them want to bond with you every time you make an appearance?" He merely shrugged and scratched the back of his head in embarrassment. “Asari children share certain traits of the other species involved in the bonding. It’s important for the evolution of the species to find a proper mate, and someone with my skills and accomplishments can be a big temptation, or at least that’s what Liara told me. Asari are never too quick to correct these misunderstandings.”

I could see Jack was enjoying making him uncomfortable, but thinking about Liara teaching him anything made me uncomfortable as well so I was happy once we got moving again. That feeling of jealousy was eating me up inside and confusing me. Why should I be uncomfortable about his past experiences when I wouldn’t want him to be bothered by my own?

I suppose it could be because this Shepard isn’t the same, at least not physically. I rebuilt this Shepard inch by inch, and I guess, in some screwed up way, I felt like I had some kind of claim over him. That’s completely illogical of course, I don’t own him in any way, but when he kissed me, I had such a content feeling, as if he was finally mine. Even after joining Cerberus I never had anything that I felt was actually mine. The Lazarus Project was mine, but the leader was the Illusive Man.

When I was with Jacob, I didn’t feel like he was mine because I knew it wasn’t a relationship that was meant to last. However, that kiss Shepard and I shared had nothing else attached to it. No one influenced the kiss or manipulated the situation. It just happened, and it was a moment that was solely ours. These women we’re running into make me feel like that could be the only moment we get, and like all other things in my life, it will become fleeting and insubstantial with time.

I had always thought it utterly ridiculous how women react when their significant other show attention to another woman. I had certainly turned the heads of men while they were in the company of their women, but I never understood the reactions. I used to think, what was so bad about looking, or appreciating beauty? Nevertheless, at that time I could summon some level of empathy for those women. I had begun experiencing something similar right then.

After speaking to the contact, we learned that the assassin is targeting Nassana Dantius, a wealthy politician with quite a bad reputation for killing her family to rise in rank and power.

“Nassana Dantius, huh? I was hoping to see her again.” Shepard said as he checked to make sure his weapons were in working order.

“Another Asari, Shepard?” Jack grinned as she teased him, but the same words were echoed in the back of my mind.

“Yes.” He replied before checking the chamber of his handgun and snapping it closed with a click. “She lied and manipulated me a while back, made me kill her blackmailing sister for her. I don’t think too fondly of people who manipulate me like that.”

There was an edge to his voice that I’d come to recognize, as sharp as any blade, and deadly as any gun. He often adopts that tone, whenever he speaks about people who have betrayed him in some way. It’s cold, calculating, and entirely too different compared to how he usually sounds. Something told me he’d be all too happy to let the assassin kill her, but then we’d lose our window and have difficulty locating him again.

We were greeted at the Dantius Towers by sounds of gunfire and fleeing Salarians, who were getting slaughtered by LOKI Mechs. Immediately, as we touched down Shepard fired his pistol through the glass wall and hit the charging FENRIS behind it, making it stumble to the floor and roll a few feet before exploding. With a quick flick of his wrist, the two LOKI barely managed to raise their weapons before their heads exploded, and they crumpled down into a heap of shorting circuits.

“Fucking hell, Shepard, save some for me will ya?” Jack yelled and unhosltered her shotgun while I equipped my assault rifle. Shepard laughed and walked ahead, with the two of us following behind him. “You need to step up your game, Jack. You’ll need to be twice as good to be half as awesome as me.”

Of course, Jack took that comment as a personal insult to her ass kicking abilities and after helping an injured Salarian, and learning that the tower guards just started shooting at them for no reason, Shepard and Jack began a tally. I had no interest participating in such a foolish game, but it was closer than I thought it’d be. Jack is an incredibly strong biotic and what she couldn’t kill with her gun, she obliterated with her abilities.

Shepard kept up by using his hand gun to take quick shots from limited cover, always scoring a lethal hit. He could actually kill a lot faster than Jack, but he had to lower their shields as well, so they were neck and neck for much of the time.

It didn’t take long before we started finding bodies we coudn’t account for, dead guards and pieces of LOKI scattered about that had nothing to do with us. Apparently, the assassin is taking out small groups of enemies in his path to Nassana, which is definitely taking the heat off us.

“Give me a moment.” Shepard said as his fingers quickly moved across a door’s access computer, trying to get it open. A few moments later it opened only for me to stare down the business end of a handgun pointing right at my face.

“G-Get away from me!” The Salarian holding the gun decided that the best way to welcome someone was to empty a clip into their face and squeezed the trigger. Quicker than I could see, Shepard immediately stepped toward me and slapped the weapon aside, making the bullet flash harmlessly just inches from my face and fly across the room we had entered from.

Shepard then used his other hand to eject the thermal clip, clutch the weapon, and shoved forward and flicked his wrist, disarming the Salarian and sending him sprawling to the floor. That’s when I noticed the other Salarians in the room, but was too surprised to immediately care.

“Are you okay, Miranda?” There was deep concern in his voice, but he was respectful enough not to baby me. “Yeah.” I replied, taking a deep breath to calm my nerves and smiled. “I’m good. Thanks for the save.”

He smiled and nodded before turning his attention to the room full of scared Salarians. From what we gathered by talking to them, Nassana had caught wind of the assassin and decided the best way to guarantee her survival would be just to kill everyone. I can see why Shepard hates her so much.

“I’m sorry.” The Salarian who tried to shoot her said, still on the floor hugging his legs, trying to control his own nerves. “I’m just so scared. They started shooting and I saw many of my friends die. I didn’t think anyone but guards would be up here.”

Shepard returned his gun with a full clip. “We’ve cleared the path downstairs, so you shouldn’t meet any resistance. Get to the first floor and wait for help to arrive.”

All the Salarians warily started to make their way back down the hallways we came through and one of them yelled back. “Be certain to shoot that bitch in the head! She doesn’t have a heart!”

When they were out of sight Jack laughed and smacked his shoulder. “I guess that’s your job, hotshot.” He nodded, and as if to emphasize his point, a fresh clip clicked into place. From then on we didn’t have any trouble until we reached a very exposed bridge. High winds made it difficult to get a proper footing and two mounted missile lauchers and a dozen enemies fortifying the other side made things tricky.

For this, Shepard used his sniper rifle and started targeting the missile launchers at the far end, while Jack and I used biotics to shove any overly exposed opponents off the tower. A shot rang out, and one of the missile launchers spun out of control and launched another missile inside the room behind it. The explosion knocked it out the window, causing it to crash against the bridge and detonate, shoving several guards off their feet and a few more over the side of the bridge.

Another shot rang out almost immediately after that, ripping a hole through the other launcher, making it inoperable. We used that moment to charge forward, Shepard switching back to his handgun, and within moments of storming the other side of the bridge all the guards were dead from excessive gunfire.

We continued shooting a path through the tower, hardly slowing down as the enemies became fewer and less challenging. Nassana had to run out of goons sooner or later, right? When we finally entered her office, Nassana was standing behind her desk with a just a few mercenaries guarding her. Yep, the Eclipse mercenaries have definitely been downsized.

“Shepard?” Nassana said in surprise and stared at him in disbelief. “But…you were dead.” He only shrugged and replied. “Would saying I got better sound like a cliché?” She only glared at him and walked forward. “I never would have guessed you were the assassin sent to kill me. This must be very ironic for you, Shepard. First you kill my sister and now you’re trying to kill me.”

I roll my eyes and say. “You’re completely out of your mind. We’re not here to kill you, your guards just attacked us.”

“I’m not a fool!” She replies and motions to her guards, who train their weapons on us. She’s too busy ranting to notice a the ventillation system above our heads shifting, as if holding on to extra weight it wasn’t built for. “Who else could possibly be trying to break in here besides you? Do you want money? I can pay you anything you want.”

That caused Shepard to laugh and shake his head. “No amount of money in the world can prevent what’s about to happen to you Nassana.”

Almost as soon as he finished talking our target dropped out of the ventilation, snapped one guards neck, crushed the windpipe of another, grabbed his gun and surged forward, taking out the last guard with a shot to the face and immediately closed the distance to Nassana, the gun pressed against her stomach for almost two full seconds before he pulled the trigger. She died far too quickly considering the number of innocent people she’s killed over the years. 

The Drell respectfully lowered her body to her desk and crossed her arms in front of her. I’d say this recruitment is complete.


	3. Part 3

Now I must admit, I’m proud I’m not like most women. I don’t have any particular need for material goods beyond that which I need for my own survival. I use minimal makeup for the purposes of coercing rather than any personal satisfaction, and I’m extremely picky about the type of men I sleep with. Even before humanity discovered alien life, our stance on sex had lightened up considerably. Scientific advancement had evolved far enough that there were pills which had a hundred percent chance of preventing pregnancy.

As much as people tried to deny it in the past, Humans are a very sexually driven species. However, as time went on and Humans evolved, so did the diseases. These days it’s very commonplace for two lovers to share a medical report before sex, and it only became more important after Humans spread apart across the galaxy and began having sex with other species.

The two other men I slept with were carefully arranged through an online service and kept secret from the prying eyes of my father. The first man I slept with wasn’t very pleasant. The moment he saw me, he just wanted to get our clothes off and get inside me. If I hadn’t wanted to rebel against my father so badly I would have shoved the pushy bastard through the wall.

The second guy I slept with was a lot nicer, perhaps too nice, as he didn’t really give me a huge release. After that I just lost interest in pursuing a sexual relationship anyone. That is, until I met Jacob. He was handsome and nice and our first night together was incredible, but a relationship can only survive on sex for so long. We had too many differences and the physical part of the relationship wasn’t enough to make up for them.

We remained close friends after we put an end to things, and while I was tempted more than once to indulge with him again, it just didn’t seem like a good idea. Even so, Jacob had awakened that side of me, and not having that kind of release for over a year made me feel incredibly stressed. It didn’t help that my previous lover and the man who had been haunting my dreams for such a long time were working off some excess energy by sparring…shirtless.

Unlike Jack, who was standing beside me cheering, I was trying not to be so obvious about my appreciation for their bodies. Jacob was built strong and looked like a big wall with his shirt off, but he’s also deceptively gentle. I can honestly say I miss being held in those strong arms of his.

Shepard wasn’t as big. His toned body flexed with his movement, as if he’s a tiger ready to spring forward in the blink of an eye and take down his prey. Simply put, Jacob is stronger and Shepard is faster, but Shepard has been trained to enter facilities and quietly take down entire units one at a time without anyone else noticing. He easily kept up with Jacob, sidestepping his jabs delivering a few quick strikes of his own. They obviously didn’t cause much pain, but that wasn’t the point.

Shepard’s training involved taking down an opponent before he can sound an alert, and he can’t actually use most of those skills without hurting Jacob enough to bench him for a while. Still, I know how good he is and I know that if he tried then Jacob would be out cold already. Even so, that didn’t stop me from watching them closely.

This gave me an excuse to look at Shepard without things becoming awkward. Many people were crowded around watching the fight after all, why should it be unusual if I’m doing the same? Granted, in my mind I was removing the rest of Shepard’s clothing and running my hands over his strong chest. I know every inch of him of course, but it’s a lot different seeing how his muscles flexed with every movement, how his strong hands clutched tight, and how the fine sheen of sweat covered his..Damn him!

I shuddered quite noticeably before I could stop myself and Jack picked right up on it. “Wow, how long has it been since you experienced a good pounding, cheerleader?” I could do nothing else but answer her question with a glare, which only made her laugh. At that moment, it felt like it had been a hundred years, but I wasn’t about to tell her that.

“You’ve been spending a lot of time with Shepard lately. Hoping he’ll do something about your dry spell?” If that bitch doesn’t shut up really soon there will be two fights instead of one. I tried to ignore her, but when Jack wants your attention, she knows exactly what to say to get it.

“You know,” Her grin only spread wider, and for some reason, I knew I wasn’t going to like whatever came out of her mouth next. “I offered to fuck him just the other day. It was obvious he wanted me, so I just thought I’d get it out of the way.” That warmth in my chest suddenly felt like a ball of acid, and nothing I could do stopped the look of dismay on my face. “Now that’s quite a story. Trust me, if you decide to jump him, you won’t regret it, cheerleader. He knows what he’s doing.”

That bitch! I reacted totally on instinct, balled up my first, and hit her as hard as I could, knocking her to the floor. “Fucking hell!” Jack yelled and jumped to her feet to return the favor, but noticing the fight, Shepard crossed the room quickly and stood between us at the exact moment Jack swung, hitting him hard in the stomach by accident. A blue light suffused her hand only briefly, showing that the punch had been strengthened by biotics.

Shepard hadn’t been shielded, so it sent him stumbling back several feet across the room, slamming into the opposite wall. He barely managed to keep his footing, and then I was already across the room and at his side. “Shepard! Are you okay?!” Not waiting for an answer I moved aside his hand which clutched the spot he’d been punched. What I saw was blood, and a lot of it.

Jacob quickly informed EDI to contact Dr. Chakwas and then Jack was also at his side. I wanted to give her a few choice words and hit her again, but there was this look on her face. She looked very worried, not for herself, but for Shepard. I couldn’t recall a time she was ever worried about anyone other than herself.

“Sorry,” I looked at Shepard in surprise as he apologized. “I’m getting blood all over your hard work.” He laughed at his own joke but then clenched his teeth as the movement shot pain through his body. “Stop talking and wait for the Doctor!” I tried to say that in my best commanding voice, but it came out sounding as worried as I was feeling. I’m a scientist so I could clearly see it wasn’t as bad as it looked, but we didn’t have time to test his ability to take wounds like this.

Bio-Synthetic Fusion was the only way we could rebuild Shepard completely, but it does in fact have some flaws. These two very different things need to work in a perfect harmony for Shepard to stay alive, because we can’t actually replace any organs if they become irreparably damaged. To counteract this problem we gave him the ability to very slowly regenerate injured or entirely damaged organs.

This is very unnatural for the human body, however, and it takes its toll on the subject. Sometimes it doesn’t even work, so even a small wound could be potentially fatal for him. Sometimes I forget that Shepard is always one step away from dying again, even when he’s not being shot at. If even a couple of his synthetics failed, he could become a corpse again, and that worried me a lot.

Dr. Chakwas soon arrived and knelt down to inspect the wound. “Yeah, it looks nasty but it’s not too serious. Help me get him to the infirmary, and we’ll get him patched up quick.” I needed and was about to hoist him to his feet when Jack stopped me with a look. “Let me do it. It’s the least I could do, considering it’s my fault.” Not wanting to argue at this point, I relented my hold on him and Jack slung his arm over her shoulder and helped him stand.

As they walked through the door to the elevator, I walked close behind them, with Chakwas and Jacob following. I’m certain I’m the only one who heard Jack say, “Sorry about that, Shepard.”

Later that night…

I was sitting at my computer typing up the report for the Thane mission when the door suddenly opened and Shepard walked inside. I had spent the last three hours trying to ignore that pain in my heart that started when Jack admitted she had slept with Shepard. I tried to look at him like nothing was different, but I knew I looked miserable.

“Care to tell me why you two tried to kill each other earlier?” The wound was healing nicely, or he was just good at hiding it. He walked up to my desk and sat down on the edge, looking right into my eyes. The hurt feeling in my heart battled with the pleasurable feeling of his green eyes staring a hole through me. At that moment, I finally became tired of it all. Tired of not being honest with myself, tired of keeping it all inside and trying to analyze everything about it so it would make sense to me.

I was tired of being obsessed with this man and being forced to hide it. So I was honest.

“Jack was boasting about how you two had sex, and before I knew it she was on the floor, and my hand was hurting.” I tried looking him in the eyes without feeling insecure, but jealousy was a new emotion for me. I didn’t know how to deal with it, and it was making me feel things I’d never felt before. I pride myself on being a strong woman, but this man makes me feel weak sometimes. Why does it have to be this way with him?

He stared as me for several seconds before sighing and clicking his tongue in annoyance. “You could have just asked me, you know. I tell you everything, Miranda. If you want to know if I’m having sex with anyone else then ask me.” I glared at him for a moment and finally gave in. “Fine, are you having sex with anyone else?”

His response was to smile and lean across the desk, claiming my lips with his in a searing kiss that reminded me of that time we shared before reaching Illium. Except this time, he didn’t tease. It was hard and possessive and when I felt his hand clutch at my chin to hold my head in place, I couldn’t hold back the sound of pleasure that escaped my mouth. It was over far too quickly for my liking, but when he pulled away, I was breathing hard, my mind all kinds of fuzzy.

“No, I’m not having sex with anyone else.” I looked at him in surprise, and he smiled again. “Jack did indeed offer sex to get rid of stress, but I turned her away.” He let go of my chin and leaned back, settling down on the edge of the table. “Why?” I’ve never known any man to turn down an offer for sex, especially meaningless sex.

He shrugged. “I can’t say I wasn’t tempted. With everything that has happened to me, indulging in a night of passion might not be such a bad idea, and I get the impression it’d be one hell of a night, but I can’t earn her respect that way. I need her loyalty, and I can’t do that if I use her like every other man she’s come across. Also…”

He slid off my desk and briefly looked like a mischievous cat as he walked around it and stood before me. He gently took my hand and bid me to stand up, which I did without hesitation. He was standing close enough that when I rose up my body was pressed against his again, and I didn’t even try to hide the sound of pleasure that escaped me. It just felt so good to feel his body against mine. I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of it. “I have a thing for a certain raven haired beauty that keeps dominating my thoughts every day.”

I felt unaccountably pleased by his admission. I leaned forward and kissed him, and pressed my body as much against his as possible. I felt his hands rub against my back as he squeezed me closer, and my arms circled his neck to do the same. My mind went blank and I didn’t care. For the first time in my life, I just let myself thoroughly enjoy the moment. No fears, no worries, no strings that I didn’t want attached, it was our moment, and I had no regrets.

I brought this incredible man back to life. It seemed only natural he’d return the favor.


	4. Part 4

It only took two weeks for my confidence to return, and I started to feel like me again. Shepard and I took every moment we could to be alone. Sometimes we would just sit and talk, other times we’d spend what scant few minutes of privacy we had to act on our desires with our lips and hands. After a talk about where things were headed, we both decided to take things slow and see where this leads us.

I took no small amount of joy out of teasing him. It didn’t take much to make the normally unflappable Commander Shepard lose his control around me. That teasing had led us to his room, where I swear I was just stopping by to hand him a report, then somehow we ended up on his couch, my legs straddling him, while he groaned into the rather scorching kiss that made my toes curl in pleasure.

I admit it, I enjoyed it far too much when his hands wandered down and gave my ass a firm squeeze, making me shudder and press tighter against him. In the last two weeks, I’ve learned a couple new things about Shepard. The first revelation being he was an ass guy. He really enjoyed squeezing my ass and guiding my movements against him. I didn’t mind one bit, he’s rather good with his hands, but whenever I pressed against him I could feel his hardness.

Straddling his hips made it nearly impossible to avoid, and each time I felt it rub between my legs it reminded me that I hadn’t been intimate with anyone in over a year. I whimpered, actually whimpered, into his mouth when I felt it, which caused him to sigh with pleasure at the sound. Speaking of which, the second thing I learned is that he really enjoys tearing those sounds out of me.

I know I’ve gained the reputation of being a cold hearted bitch, and I didn’t exactly do anything to dissuade that rumor when I first became his XO, so I imagine there is some pleasure to be gained in making me, as he put it just days ago, melt. I probably should have been annoyed by it, and I was…for all the three seconds it took for him to cross the room and pull me into a kiss that actually made me feel like every nerve ending in my body was melting.

The combination of his heated, swollen lips, his firm, grasping hands, and the hardness that was threatening to tear through his pants was making it damn near impossible to resist the urge to ravish him right there on the spot. I felt like he had unleashed something within me, the sexual woman who so very rarely got to show herself. A part of me worried that my assertiveness might be off-putting, Shepard is a man who likes control after all, but he always responded favorably.

I had actually been the one to walk up and straddle him, and I’ll never forget the look on his face when I did so. I hadn’t even been this assertive with Jacob, just allowing him to be in control all the time. Shepard seemed to love that side of me, so I kept myself close, rubbing against his chest and the hardness in his pants. I don’t know which one of us started breathing hard first, but it wasn’t long before I felt like there wasn’t nearly enough oxygen on the ship.

With great reluctance, I pulled my lips away from his only far enough to breathe, and just closed my eyes to enjoy the sensation of feeling his chest rise and fall against mine. My lips felt swollen and they hurt a little, but that just made it all better to me. Damn, this man can kiss. I was immensely displeased when his hands left the curve of my ass, but one of them slide slowly up to my back and wound gently into my hair, pulling me in again.

This time it was gentle, slow, more for the enjoyment than the desire, and finished within moments.

“Damnit, Miranda. You’re making it really difficult not to carry you over to my bed and have my wicked way with you for a few days.” My eyes darted to the bed in question, and I shuddered as my mind showed me an image of him doing exactly that. Every inch of my body demanded that I give myself to him in every way possible and damn rational thought all to hell. Nevertheless, I couldn’t, not yet, not until I was sure of my own feelings.

I’d acknowledged my desire for Shepard, but the side of me that just enjoyed his presence, his smile, the fact that he makes my heart beat faster and my rational mind become blank, needed some more answers, answers only I can find within myself. With my three previous lovers, it didn’t require much thinking. I did it because I could, but this was different. This was the man I brought back to life. He’s here because of me.

However, beyond that, everything else is his decision. If he decided to leave me, it would be his own choice and there would be nothing I could do about it. I knew that if I took that leap, the pain of possibly losing him would need to be worth the joy of having him. I can’t submit to my feelings before I know the answer to that question. But still, my body wanted him, and it was damned hard not to give in.

I didn’t trust my voice, so I only shook my head, and he just smiled and nodded. “Take however long you need. I’m not going anywhere.” He gave me a short, reassuring kiss that made me smile, just before EDI switched on.

“We’ve arrived at our destination, Commander Shepard. The clothes you asked for arrived aboard a cargo ship, and they’re being delivered to your room as we speak.”

I didn’t even know I could move that fast. One moment we’re pressed together intimately on the couch, and the next I’m halfway across the room trying not to look guilty. “Thank EDI.” Shepard replied and the terminal shut down again. I looked at him curiously. “I didn’t hear anything about a mission. Planning to going somewhere, Commander?”

There was a beep at the door, and I made sure to stay out of sight until the door closed and Shepard appeared with a really nice looking suit slung over his shoulder. “Yeah, our newest crew member, Kasumi Goto, has a problem she needs taken care of before she can focus on the mission. I don’t need the crew going through that relay with doubts. It’s mostly a party for rich people, and will likely include more talking than fighting.”

“And you’re going in alone?” He walked past me and into a smaller, adjoining room and closed the door, the rustling of his clothing indicating that he was changing. What an image! “Kasumi will be there to back me up if it comes to that. Going in with a team will make our job a lot more difficult.”

I tried so hard not to imagine him naked just a few feet away from me, but it was difficult. I’d already seen him without a shirt on. I could only imagine what he looked like with everything else off. Oh, and imagine I did. I was having a rather nice fantasy of re-familiarizing myself with every inch of his naked body through touch and taste when he stepped out of the room and took my breath away.

Ok, clothes are good too. 

I was used to seeing the man in his combat armor that I wasn’t prepared for how he looked in a well made suit. “So what do you think?” He asked and gave a quick spin. When he turned to face me again he suddenly found himself pressed against the wall with my lips claiming his. He was surprised only for half a second, then he grabbed me and returned the kiss with equal fervor. It was hard, demanding, and did things to my lower body that made me shudder.

I have no idea how long it took for me to pull away, but when I did he had a dazed expression on his face which told me I had literally kissed him senseless. “Does that answer your question?” He slowly nodded his head and grinned, but didn’t seem to like it when I pulled away from him. “I’ll leave first and return to my room, Shepard. Good luck on your mission.” With that I turned around and left his room, and I knew his eyes followed the sway of my ass until the door closed behind me.


	5. Part 5

As the weeks passed, we became far more daring, the prospect of taking things slowly being much more difficult than I ever imagined. His hands thoroughly explored my body through my skintight clothes every day, and I’m not ashamed to admit I became addicted to his touch. About a week ago Shepard got caught up in a mission that required him to spend a few days away from the ship. I didn’t even see him coming when he returned, all I felt was his arms as they wrapped around me, and when I turned my head to greet him, I was met with a kiss of so much need I almost gave in right that moment.

I was so caught up in the kiss that I didn’t notice his hands until they slid up my body and cupped both of my breasts, giving them a firm squeeze that tore an embarrassingly loud moan from me, and in return, I rubbed my ass back against his bulging, pants-covered erection. All the kissing we’d done was a sort of release for me, allowing me to vent my stress in a very pleasurable fashion, but that felt different. My outfit is skintight out of necessity. I move around quite effortlessly in them, but I’m aware of what effect my outfit has on the opposite sex.

Despite the clothe obstructing his touch, I felt his fingers keenly, and the way his hands molded to my breasts made me feel lightheaded with pleasure. I enjoyed his boldness more than I’ll ever admit, knowing that he’d never do it if he was in perfect control of his actions. I loved making him lose control more than anything, and I love a man who isn’t afraid to make it clear what he wants.

Being treated as fragile my entire life made people underestimate me, which always gave me an advantage when the time came to show them I wasn’t made of glass. Even Jacob had a tendency to stay in control of his own actions. It was sweet of him, but I’m a lot stronger than people realize. Shepard has never underestimated me, though. His grip was firm and his fingers strong as they slowly squeezed and groped my breasts.

The combination of the kiss, his hands on my breasts, and his erection pressing against my ass created a situation where all I could do was press my body back against his and groan in pleasure. At that moment, he could have made me do anything as long as he continued taking me. And taking me was exactly what he was doing. His kiss was deep and hard, his fingers possessive of my almost too willing body, and his erection a very firm reminder of what I do to him, as well as what he could do to me.

I finally pulled my mouth from his but couldn’t even begin to summon the willpower to pull away from his body. I reached out for something to hold on to when his fingers found my hardened nipples and rubbed them through my outfit, nearly making me lose my footing, but thankfully the wall beside my desk was close enough to lean against. The room became filled with sounds of my pants and moans, words of pleasure got cut short every time his strong hands gripped harder, or his firm erection dug deeper.

I didn’t need to see him to know he was watching me closely. Another thing I’d discovered about him was that he studied my reactions as often as possible, finding what drove me crazy, then focused on that. However, this wasn’t some impromptu kiss in the hallway or our bedrooms. It was a lustful attack on my senses.

I groaned in disappointment as one of his hands softened its hold on me and disappeared behind my body, only to slide up my back, which felt better than it really should have, and gripped the zipper that held my outfit together from the waist up. When I shuddered and almost panicked at the thought of finally exposing myself to him, and knowing if I did I’d hardly be able to resist being ravished by him, I felt him lean forward and whisper in my ear with breathy words that gave evidence his control was balancing on the edge of a very sharp knife.

“You already know every inch of me.” He whispered and I tried to steady my breathing as a mental image of his body appeared in my mind, only that time his body was leaning against me, possessing my body with touch and sounds. “I think it’s fair I learn every inch of you.” The thought of him staring at my body, learning everything he needed to know with his hands, made me feel so horny I struggled not to beg him to continue.

“But you have to tell me to do it, Miranda. It has to be your choice.” God, how I love this man. That was the thought that came to my mind in that moment, and I finally got the answer I’d been searching for. It didn’t take weeks of thought and deep contemplation. It took one small moment in the growing list of moments where he set his desire aside and gave me control over what happened next. I knew in that moment, even if I stopped him again, or even a thousand times more, he would still be there, allowing me to make that choice every time.

He knew about my insecurities, and he was giving me the choice of what to do with my body. I love him for that, like no one I’ve ever known. Coming to a decision, I looked back at him with a grin on my face. “Take it off, Shepard, but you’re not going to leave this room until you finish what you started.” To emphasize my point I rubbed my ass against the heated erection in his pants, this time making him groan at the sensation.

I heard the zipper trail down my back and felt the top half of my outfit loosen, although it was still clinging due to sweat caused by his hands before. When the zipper was all the way down I slowly, teasingly, lowered the front of my outfit down just above my breasts and looked back at him. The sight made his breath hitch, and I felt a cold thrill slide through my body as I once again made Shepard completely speechless.

He reached out with one hand and ran his fingers down my exposed back, and the feeling of him touching my skin for the first time was almost too much to process. My outfit covers every inch of my body except my face and parts of my neck, so before that moment, I never felt his actual touch against my skin. After weeks of holding myself back, feeling his deep kisses and caressing, squeezing touches, my skin felt overly sensitive. He spread such fire with his touch, stoking that furnace within me that made my entire body burn with pleasure and want him more than anyone I’ve ever met.

I could feel his erection straining against his pants, knowing it must be beyond painful to keep it restrained like that, but he seemed far too focused on me to care about his own relief. I finally pulled the outfit over my breasts and down to my stomach, exposing a bra which he quickly unsnapped and tossed aside with a flick of his hand. The cool air of the ship battled against the heat emanating from my body, which created a pleasant sensation on my skin.

When I finally turned around and exposed myself to him, I knew he would stare, and I wanted him to. My breasts are high and very firm without any sign of gravity making them droop. My nipples were already hard from all the attention, but were made even harder when the cold air hit them. Lust burned in his eyes, and right when I was certain he memorized me by sight, he leaned forward and captured my lips with his for only a single, heated moment, before he pulled back and removed his shirt, tossing it in the direction of my discarded bra.

I closed the distance and pulled him back in for another kiss and for the first time, both of our bodies met, his chest against mine. I always loved the feeling of his body pressing against mine, now I’m addicted to the feeling. His strong, muscled chest pressed against my firm breasts, and I moaned at the sensation of my nipples rubbing up against his skin. My body felt so sensitive, so hot, so sexually aroused that the feeling was enough to make me moan into his mouth at the exact moment he moaned into mine.

There was no more room for doubts, and I didn’t have a single one. I was in love with Shepard, a man destined to save the galaxy, and I would be there by his side to the very ends of the universe and life itself if need be. However, right now, my bed is much closer.


	6. Part 6

Interesting Fact: It’s a challenge to remove clothing when you can’t stop kissing or touching each other. We blindly stumbled to my bed, strangely enough having a considerably difficult time of it being it’s a straight walk from my office. I was turned on, so very turned on, and I almost pitied him how uncomfortable he must be in his pants, if I feel like I’m going to die if I don’t get my own off.

As we reached my bed, I pulled away from him and turned around, then teased him with a quick look over my shoulder and bent over slightly. I’ve never wanted someone to admire my body more in my entire life. The way he stared at me, like a hungry tiger stalking its prey, made me want to be devoured by his very capable mouth. His hands reached for the bottom part of my suit, but I slapped them aside and grinned at him mischievously and started to lower them myself.

I gave a little show, a slight shimmy to my hips as they peeled down over the curve of my ass and took the lacy panties with them. I sighed when my heated sex was exposed to the much colder room temperature, creating a heady sensation as I exposed myself to Shepard for the first time. My pants was only just below my knees when I felt his hands on my ass, how his hands squeezed and spread me open to his gaze.

For the first time in a long while, I felt a little embarrassed. I was completely exposed to him. Nothing was left to hide about my body, and he was staring at me, wide, open and wet for him. I just stood there as he looked at me for a full minute, and I was about to turn around when I felt his hot breath between my legs, followed by his warm, slithering tongue. It might as well have been a lightning bolt, because I cried out and lost my balance a bit. He kept my hips raised even as I pressed my forehead against the bed and grasped handfuls of the covering.

A second swipe of his tongue made me pant loudly, and I didn’t even have the presence of mind to care that my reaction was a little strong. It had been over a year. I'd been lusting after this man for so long, and I never took the time to pleasure myself for release. For me, that was reasoning enough to act a little wanton. In any case, Shepard didn’t seem to mind one bit, and continued to slide his tongue over and around my dripping sex.

If he enjoyed making me moan, then he was definitely getting a treat. I cried out loudly with each stroke of his tongue, and my body moved on its own, thrusting back against his face. His hands continued to squeeze my ass and keep it spread so he could have free access to me, and I just knew my knuckles had to be turning white from squeezing the covers so tightly.

Each thought was shattered into a million pieces, as soon as they appeared, and I silently thanked whoever decided to make the rooms soundproof, because if they hadn’t then the entire ship would know what I sound like in bliss. He stopped a moment and I had to fight the urge to turn my head and complain, but I felt him shift closer and that talented tongue of his slipped between the folds of my sex and entered me in one swift motion.

Before I could even process the sensation completely, my nerve endings overloaded with pleasure and all the fire that had been burning throughout my body quickly pooled down below and released. I’m pretty sure I shouted a word that wasn’t part of my normal vocabulary, but I didn’t care. I thrusted back at his tongue even as my hips moved in quick circles to escape it, but using both of his hands, he kept himself between my legs and his tongue wriggling inside of me, eagerly lapping up my first orgasm in a year.

It seemed to take forever for it to end, but when I could finally process thoughts I gasped as his tongue continued its journey into my sensitive depths. I almost didn’t notice that I was sweating a lot, but I didn’t care. I was feeling too good to care about anything but the sensation of the man I’ve wanted for so long giving me such wonderful attention. One of his hands left my ass and moved between my legs, making me cry out sharply as two of his fingers rubbed against my clit.

The combination sent me hurtling over the knife’s edge again, and I came just as hard as before, making my entire body shudder continuously for what felt like an eternity before I all but collapsed onto my bed. That time he didn’t hold me up to continue his blissful torture, but I honestly believed I would die if he tried that again so soon. I felt movement beside me as he joined me on the bed and waited patiently for my strength to return, and I was eternally grateful for that.

After a few minutes, I rolled over to look at him and caught the smile on his face as he watched me. My heart fluttered and I tried not to admit that I was in love with him just yet. But, it was hard, so very hard. He bent down and gave me a deep kiss which made every inch of me feel loved. I took my time to enjoy it, but I could also feel the bulge in his pants rubbing against my side. Suddenly feeling rejuvenated with the prospect of paying him back for those two mind numbing orgasms, I pulled away from the kiss and rubbed my hand against his erection.

“Shepard,” I paused as I watched his eyes glaze over while I stroked him. God, I loved that look on his face when I knew I was the one causing it. “If you stand up right now, I’ll make sure this isn’t a problem anymore.” I emphasized the word “this” by giving his erection a hard squeeze. I guess he didn’t need more convincing, because he crawled off the bed and stood at the foot of it without delay.

Knowing it would drive him crazy, I rolled over onto my hands and knees and crawled toward him, making my breasts sway with each movement. It had the desired effect, and I watched him clench his teeth and let out a low groan at the sight. His hands balled up beside him, as him trying to stop himself from having his way with me.

That would come later, right then I wanted to reward him. Who’s the prey now, Shepard?

When I reached the end of the bed I shifted into a sitting position and looked up at him as I cupped him with my hand. I was so enthralled by the lust in his eyes I forgot that he really was in pain at this point, and just continued to stroke his length. I was brought back to the situation at hand, literally, when I saw the discomfort reflected in his gaze and decided to end his suffering.

I took hold of his pants and slowly lowered them, surprised not to discover underwear, but flesh, sliding down his apparently considerable length before it sprang free. I very nearly laughed at the sound of relief he let out when his erection escaped his pants, but decided in my current position that might be unwise. Men and their fragile little egos. Although I know every inch of him, I certainly didn’t know what he’d look like with a hardon, and I was more then a little intimidated.

I wrapped my fingers around his erection as much as I could and found the sensation of his throbbing appendage expanding in my hand strangely thrilling. My grip made his breath hitch and when I looked up at him again I could see him breathing in and out at a controlled rhythm, trying to control himself, no less. It finally grew to its full nine inch length, and I gave him a hard, thorough stroke with my hand from base to tip and back down.

I was unimaginably pleased when his controlled breathing was suddenly halted by his deep moan of pleasure, which in turn made my own sex throb. “Hold back for fifteen minutes and you’ll get a prize, Shepard.” I grinned up at him and made sure it was challenging, he never could resist a challenge, after all. His smile was strained but he nodded in acknowledgment. I turned my attention back to his erection and started pumping my fist hard, covering the entire length with each stroke.

I listened to the sounds he made and adjusted my grip and the length of my strokes to see what he liked best. At that moment, it was hard to tell because he hadn’t experienced his own release yet and everything I did felt incredible to him. I had a secret of my own that Shepard would soon discover: I really enjoy oral sex. Not just receiving it, but giving it as well.

I’ve no clue why I enjoy it so much, but I do, and I wanted to do something to Shepard, I’d never done to any other lover before him. Even so, that was for later, and his groans of pleasure kept stoking that fire within me, almost demanding that I shift my attention back to my own body. But, I ignored it and focused on him, that incredible man who felt like he was burning my hand with the heat from his throbbing shaft.

I looked up briefly to see him staring at me so intensely I almost felt like the prey once more, as if he would feed upon me at any moment to sate his hunger. Not trusting myself not to give in to that burning desire, I decided to avoid his gaze entirely, and when I looked at his erection again I noticed the very tip was wet with precum. There was no way I could resist that temptation, so I leaned forward and gave the head a long, swirling lick that allowed me to gather it all up, and very pointedly swallow it.

“Holy shit!” A long moan escaped his mouth, and I knew it was definitely worth it just to hear him say that. I stopped stroking him and raised his erection, so I could reach the underside, then made sure he was paying close attention as I started at the bottom of his shaft above his balls, and gave one long, torturous lick up to the tip. I literally felt his entire body shudder, and the strangled moan of pleasure that managed to escape his mouth almost made me believe he’d find his own release right then and there.

However, he summoned up enough willpower to hold himself back, even if just barely. I swear I don’t know where he draws all that restraint from, but I’m appreciative. It gave me enough time to play with him, as well as thank him for being so patient with me. If I blew his previous lovers out of the water in the process, then bonus points for me.

I decided to keep up my momentum and slid my fist down to the bottom of his shaft and took the throbbing head into my mouth. I didn’t wait for his reaction, instead I went for a bigger one, and slowly lowered my lips and swallowed half his erection down my throat. I felt his hands rest atop my head, but he didn’t force me, one way or another. I was more surprised, and extremely thrilled, to hear a small growl of pleasure escape his mouth.

That one sound made me feel better than anyone before it. That sound was more instinctual, speaking to the animal deep inside all of us who responds to pleasure at a more primal level. Normally, people don’t make that sound easily, but I was pleasuring a man who has been holding himself back against all the pleasure he’s being given. I didn’t hold back, I released all over his face two times and practically screamed doing so.

I very nearly felt bad for doing that to him, but something told me he wouldn’t mind it at all once his got his own release. The fighter in him would not allow him to lose the challenge, so he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. I pulled him out of my mouth and stole a quick peek at the bedside clock, and saw there were just five minutes remaining in the challenge. How time flies when you’re having fun.

He noticed the time as well and gave me a determined smirk, which I returned, and got back to work. I sucked the head of his erection back inside my mouth and swirled with my tongue around it swiftly several times before wriggling against the very tip. My fist skimmed up and down his heated length and when I felt his fingers winding in my hair, only slightly guiding my movements, I moaned around him, the vibrations from the sound making his hips jerk.

I alternated between playing with the head and trying to take as much of his length inside my mouth as possible, only getting a little more than halfway down before I reached my limit without further practice. When I wanted to mix things up, I’d pull my mouth off him, which he made quite clear he didn’t appreciate, much to my amusement, and bathe his entire length with my tongue.

The heady situation was getting to my head, making my mind a little fuzzy until the only things I could focus on were the sounds and feelings of his erection. My mouth slurped up and down his length, and it made very audible noises. I liked those sounds. They always sounded as sexual as the act that’s creating them. His grip became tighter and more demanding the closer we got to the time limit, and I allowed him to take control because I had worked him up this hard to do exactly that.

When it finally got down to the last few seconds, he removed his hands from my head and allowed me to make the final choice. God, I love this man! That only made the next decision easier and when he released right on the dot, I kept him in my mouth and swallowed his release. That was the one thing I had never done with my previous lovers, and I wanted Shepard to have something no one else had before him.

Being inexperienced, I struggled to swallow it all, but it was just so much! Some of it leaked out, and I knew I had to be one hell of a sight, but Shepard was much too busy to notice. His head was thrown back, his eyes closed, his mouth opened, but no sound came out for a good five seconds until his long moan of intense pleasure filled the room and made my entire body shudder with enjoyment. His hips twitched with every burst of his release and didn’t stop moving until he was done.

When I became certain he had finished, I gave his shaft one more stroke to get the rest out and pulled my mouth off him with a pop. He was watching me again, and I made a show of swallowing before I met his gaze. I didn’t mind the taste, but I’m certain I can attribute that to his rather healthy eating habits. After such an intense experience, the air was practically humming with sexual energy, and to my surprise, I found that his length was still mostly erect, and I got the impression the night was going to be a long one.


	7. Part 7

I crawled backward on the bed until I settled back and laid my head against the soft pillows. I called to him to join me not through words, such a form of communication suddenly felt so inadequate, but through the simple movement of spreading my legs, and revealing my sex to his hungry gaze once again. Almost by instinct I dipped my hand down between my legs and lightly prodded my opening with two fingers, then gasped and sharply arched my back as I found myself far more sensitive than I thought I’d be.

I don’t know if it was the result of what I’d done to him just moments before, the anticipation of having him inside of me, or if I was discovering a side to myself, I never knew existed before then. Either way, I got the desired reaction from him and moments later he lowered his body down against mine and the fully body contact without a single thing obstructing our touch was such a perfect feeling. We fit so well together, the way his hips pressed against mine, and my thighs rubbed against his.

With every breath, our bodies rubbed together, and my breasts flattened against his strong chest, making my hardened nipples spread a body numbing combination of fire and ice through every inch of my body. His lips descended and claimed mine, tearing another shuddering moan out of me that only excited him further when he could feel his effect on me. I could feel his length rub against my thigh, and it was obvious he had returned to full erection within that short span of time.

Two years ago, when the Lazarus Project began, if someone told me I’d later become the passionate lover of the man I was attempting to revive, I would have tossed them out of the nearest airlock. However, so many things had changed. I changed. This man began the change long before he could even interact with me, so when he finally did return to the land of the living, I was almost ready to be the woman he needed. The following months together finished the entire process, one mind numbing kiss at a time.

So when his hard length finally pressed against my opening, I was ready to be made his, and spread my legs further to give him easier access. Then I was slowly being filled, his erection stretching me in all the right ways, and I had to pull my mouth away from his to vocalize the feeling rather loudly, and I could tell that he was using all of his willpower to control himself, so he wouldn’t hurt me. It may have been a year for me, but it was double that for him, so I wrapped my legs strongly around his waist and made his descent inside of me a little quicker.

I didn’t know how much I missed the feeling until I felt his hips press against mine. His length was finally buried as deep within me as possible. No one had ever reached some depths inside of me, and I did feel some pain, but the intense look in his eyes as he watched my face for any signs of discomfort made me quickly ignore it. For a torturously long thirty seconds we only watched each other and breathed deeply.

Then he started to pull out of me, and I held my breath for every inch, until only the head was inside, he then thrust back within me, harder and faster than before. My entire body shuddered in delight as he set the pace, and I made sure to squeeze his hips and draw him in faster, whenever I knew I could take it. This wasn’t about making love, it was about experiencing one another in the rawest way possible for a human.

Groans and cries of pleasure escaped freely from both of us and became punctuated by the sound of our hips slapping against each other. He shattered my thoughts with every thrust, and I didn’t care that I was screaming for him, wanting him deeper and faster, demanding that he change my entire world each time his chest pressed against mine, and his length stretched me in ways no one had before.

Soon, when he was certain I could take whatever he did to me, his thrusts moved faster, harder, deeper, melting and reviving my nerve endings with each pounding thrust. I didn’t know when it happened, but at some point I had closed my eyes, so when I opened them again I was greeted by the strained look on his face, the same look he had not long ago when I sucked him to release. I watched him groan in pleasure with each thrust, and I loved the look on his face when he caught me looking and smiled.

Almost as soon as he did he leaned up a bit and captured my left nipple between his lips, supported himself on the bed using his left arm, and cupped my right breast in a strong grip from his free hand. He barely slowed down as my sex clamped down tight around him, and I climaxed hard enough to drain all strength from my body. Even as I cried out his name, he didn’t slow down, and I road the crest of one orgasm into another smaller one, destroying all thoughts that didn’t include the man in my arms.

He set a furious pace within me and even the feeling of his hand squeezing my breast harder than I’ve ever felt before, as well as his wicked tongue and teeth giving such delightful abuse to my nipples, did nothing but drive me crazy. I was being taken apart and put back together again, and Shepard is the only one who could do it. I felt like I was being taken by him, like this was his way of claiming me the only way he knew he could. I’m a strong woman and I can take a lot, and he made sure no one knew that better than him.

Somewhere in the deepest part of my mind that could still formulate anything reaching a thought, I could see he was close to his release, and I started to put all of my effort into thrusting my hips up to his and squeezing his hips down toward me. I’d never had sex this hard in my life. I had always thought it’d be too painful, but it didn’t hurt with him. He always seemed to keep it just south of painful, only breaking across that thin line a few times, but I barely even noticed them.

Our bodies were covered in sweat, and the thought of taking a shower with him after this made me cry out, clamp my legs around him, and release all over his throbbing erection. He finally followed me right over the edge, and I felt him release deep inside of me, the warmth of it providing a lightning bolt of pleasure to my climax sensitized body. I gasped with a combination of surprise and pleasure when he leaned back onto his knees, grabbed my ass and lifted my hips up. He thrust as hard as he could several more times, tearing a loud “Ah!” out of me each time until he stopped filling me with his sperm.

I almost felt too sensitive as he rested his body lightly against my own, both of us gasping for what air we could pull into our lungs. The way we pressed together, feeling each other breathe and recover, was a sensation I’ll never forget. We both had given in to our powerful desire for each other, and no doubt the next day would bring the appropriate soreness to mark the event. There was so much more I wanted to do with him, but at that moment I was too utterly satisfied even to think about continuing.

I cupped the back of his neck then drew him down into a long, passionate kiss, and decided to leave the rest for later.

Tonight, I sleep in the arms of the man I love…


End file.
